1) because it's -16 degrees out there and I don't feel like trudging to school on mountains of cement-like snow covered in black ice.
2) because there's so much ice out on the street it'd be safer for everybody if they didn't go to school.
3) because it happens to be snowing and I don't want to catch anything deadly. Like snowflu. (trust me, it's real)
4) because it's really cold in the kitchen.
5) because school is so stressful I think everybody just needs to sleep in for once.
6) because I don't feel like getting up in the mornings.
7) because there's a lot of snow everywhere and the bus won't be able to bring all them poor eastsiders back home.
8) because I want to.
Monday, December 15, 2008
Monday, December 8, 2008
Sunday, November 30, 2008
Saturday, November 29, 2008
No, seriously man, color war
*in a sing-song voice*
Two teams,
Peace and love,
I was on the team,
that didn't have fun,
Team Shalom, as it was called,
had about the same amount of achdus,
as a soggy old pond,
We fought and bickered,
and didn't get along,
while the other team, ahava,
worked well all night long,
I wasn't there,
at the sleepover that night,
but I was told by my friends,
it gave them quite a fright,
points were taken away,
for things that were lost,
and post-it-notes not turned in,
definatly cost us,
Instead of the achdus,
our teachers invisioned,
people spoke lashon hora,
about other's decisions,
while many tried hard,
to practice our songs,
others went off and grumbled,
our team didn't get along,
finally the war was over,
results came in,
when Shalom lost,
even more complaints were brought in,
the judges favored ahava,
they did say,
but really they were all just sour,
for they didn't get their way,
I went home,
with a happy heart,
I didn't know who won,
for my hearing had stopped,
It was a tragic day,
when my eardrums blew,
I was trying to eat lunch,
while my teamates screamed all the way through,
all in all,
I'm glad it's over,
because right now,
my head is killing me.
PS: my ears are fine, I know you were worried.
Two teams,
Peace and love,
I was on the team,
that didn't have fun,
Team Shalom, as it was called,
had about the same amount of achdus,
as a soggy old pond,
We fought and bickered,
and didn't get along,
while the other team, ahava,
worked well all night long,
I wasn't there,
at the sleepover that night,
but I was told by my friends,
it gave them quite a fright,
points were taken away,
for things that were lost,
and post-it-notes not turned in,
definatly cost us,
Instead of the achdus,
our teachers invisioned,
people spoke lashon hora,
about other's decisions,
while many tried hard,
to practice our songs,
others went off and grumbled,
our team didn't get along,
finally the war was over,
results came in,
when Shalom lost,
even more complaints were brought in,
the judges favored ahava,
they did say,
but really they were all just sour,
for they didn't get their way,
I went home,
with a happy heart,
I didn't know who won,
for my hearing had stopped,
It was a tragic day,
when my eardrums blew,
I was trying to eat lunch,
while my teamates screamed all the way through,
all in all,
I'm glad it's over,
because right now,
my head is killing me.
PS: my ears are fine, I know you were worried.
Thursday, November 27, 2008
Saturday, November 22, 2008
Fellow Citizens
people, citizens, whatever you want to be called. Something very important has come to my attention. Let's start from them beginning, shall we?
EXHIBIT A: SUNDAY
sunday was actually pretty good. Outofammo was sick, and throwing up. And so he stayed home with the PT and me, which I thought was pretty awesome, mainly becuz he felt better in a few seconds and drew pictures of superman with us. Everything in sunday went exactly right, down to the last fun-coated-minute, and I went to bed feeling fine.
EXHIBIT B: MONDAY
Okay, I woke up (again) feeling fine. I ate some breakfast. I got dressed in my school uniform. I sang while I washed the dishes. And thats when it hit me. I'm telling you, it's like somebody was pounding my stomach. It was hard to breathe a little even. So I told my mom I wasn't feeling so well, and she gave me enough ibuprofen to kill a horse. I took these pills in a little bag and a small cup of pudding and went to school. At approximatly 8:45 AM, I staggered to the bathroom to take the pills. I opening the pudding and stuck some pills in the first bite and jammed it into my mouth and swallowed hard. I remember thinking at that point 'hey. That wasn't so hard.'
It was then I threw up all over teh counter.
After a while, somebody got a teacher and I went down to the office and fell asleep in the waiting chair. (there are many legends about the waiting chair that I may or may not divulge later) I felt horrible for the rest of the day.
EXHIBIT C: WHERE I PIECE THE EVIDENCE TOGETHER
Now, you are all probably wondering why I just told you all that. Well, while I was sick, a friend of mine called who lives far away. I told her I was sick, and she told me her whole FAMILY was sick of strep throat. This is what aroused my suscipicion. Once I began to feel better (which was later that week) I sent out emails to my other friends living elsewhere in the world, and also talked to my mother. As I expected, all reported that there were many sick people in their community who were suffering from sore throat, stomach flu, dirriah, and all kinds of other ailments. I flicked on the news where they were openly announcing who won the "least healthy city in America" (somewhere in North Dakota, I think. The city I mean, not America.) But still news of even more sick people everywhere reached me. Even in books I was reading, people were constantly suffering from illness.
My fellow Americans, this is more than mere coincidence.
Something is happening to our planet. This may be hard to believe, but something is wrong in the world. Perhaps this is the reason for our faltering economy. But whatever it is, I believe it is a prelude to something big. Something is coming! Aliens? The apocolpsye? Moshiach? Whatever it is, it is causing many, MANY people to suddenly become sick. My humble Americans, this calls for drastic action. Do you want to be the last one on the block to know when the jig is up? Come on! We must prepare for war! Grab your torch and pitchfork, let's beat this thing head on! This could be a divine signal!
Or it could be those five tubes of yogurt I just ate.
EXHIBIT A: SUNDAY
sunday was actually pretty good. Outofammo was sick, and throwing up. And so he stayed home with the PT and me, which I thought was pretty awesome, mainly becuz he felt better in a few seconds and drew pictures of superman with us. Everything in sunday went exactly right, down to the last fun-coated-minute, and I went to bed feeling fine.
EXHIBIT B: MONDAY
Okay, I woke up (again) feeling fine. I ate some breakfast. I got dressed in my school uniform. I sang while I washed the dishes. And thats when it hit me. I'm telling you, it's like somebody was pounding my stomach. It was hard to breathe a little even. So I told my mom I wasn't feeling so well, and she gave me enough ibuprofen to kill a horse. I took these pills in a little bag and a small cup of pudding and went to school. At approximatly 8:45 AM, I staggered to the bathroom to take the pills. I opening the pudding and stuck some pills in the first bite and jammed it into my mouth and swallowed hard. I remember thinking at that point 'hey. That wasn't so hard.'
It was then I threw up all over teh counter.
After a while, somebody got a teacher and I went down to the office and fell asleep in the waiting chair. (there are many legends about the waiting chair that I may or may not divulge later) I felt horrible for the rest of the day.
EXHIBIT C: WHERE I PIECE THE EVIDENCE TOGETHER
Now, you are all probably wondering why I just told you all that. Well, while I was sick, a friend of mine called who lives far away. I told her I was sick, and she told me her whole FAMILY was sick of strep throat. This is what aroused my suscipicion. Once I began to feel better (which was later that week) I sent out emails to my other friends living elsewhere in the world, and also talked to my mother. As I expected, all reported that there were many sick people in their community who were suffering from sore throat, stomach flu, dirriah, and all kinds of other ailments. I flicked on the news where they were openly announcing who won the "least healthy city in America" (somewhere in North Dakota, I think. The city I mean, not America.) But still news of even more sick people everywhere reached me. Even in books I was reading, people were constantly suffering from illness.
My fellow Americans, this is more than mere coincidence.
Something is happening to our planet. This may be hard to believe, but something is wrong in the world. Perhaps this is the reason for our faltering economy. But whatever it is, I believe it is a prelude to something big. Something is coming! Aliens? The apocolpsye? Moshiach? Whatever it is, it is causing many, MANY people to suddenly become sick. My humble Americans, this calls for drastic action. Do you want to be the last one on the block to know when the jig is up? Come on! We must prepare for war! Grab your torch and pitchfork, let's beat this thing head on! This could be a divine signal!
Or it could be those five tubes of yogurt I just ate.
Sunday, November 16, 2008
The time of my life
Okay, the TAM retreat happened this thursday. It was AWESOME! it also took two days, so I'm gonna do this as briefly as possible:
DAY 1)
A lot of stuuf happened on day 1. Trust me. First of all, before we even got on the bus to get on the resort, my carpool was fifteen minutes late. So I just sat in our living room, thinking it will probably never come and I'll have to spend the whole day at home.
So once, we finally got to TAM, we were just sat around waiting for EVERYONE ELSE to get to tam. So while we were waiting, I thought I'd check out their piano. I play a KILLER piece on piano, let me tell you. Ask Pyschotodler. He can hook you up with one of my master pieces. Unless you live with me. Then get lost. Anyway, I started playing on their piano a really nice song, it was very long though. I didn't even notice the hordes of high-schoolers collecting around me. In fact, I didn't notice until the end, where they all started applauding. It was then I fell off the chair backwards, no joke.
So after the piano incident, we got on the bus. I clocked the ride, it was 3 hours. IT WAS THAT LONG! I think I died a few times, because I rarely remember anything about the ride there except it was extremly boring. So yeah. Escpecially because my entire class was on the other bus, and I somehow got stuck with all the tam girls. So yeah.
Once we finally arrived at "the lodge" we were all assinged our rooms. Luckily for me, I got put in a room with my friends! I even did a little dance. So then we got a few minutes to unpack and get settled. Then we all went downstairs for some speeches that I found quite boring. Then we playd a game where you had to get someone else to answer questions about themselves, but I found that boring also. After that, we went outside to play a game called "Russian Passport." You had to go around to each of the boothes (countries) and do an activity. For each activity, you get a stamp. You win when your card is filled with stamps, but if you run into a "border watch" they take all your stamps away.
After this exciting game, we went to the gym to do literally nothing. I mean, really. We just sat around. So my friends and I took pictures of stuff and a movie of someone putting chopsticks in their hair. Then my friend took a picture of me strangling someone. Yeah....
Then, we ate lunch. Boy, I have never EVER had a lunch so good. I mean, there was Chicago pizza, garlic bread, a salad bar, strawberries with cream, and even dessert! Chocolate ice cream with gram crackers! I mean, this was AMAZING!!!
Then we went to a "workshop". Workshop, is another way of saying "Boring lecture that goes on for an hour." I'm not sure why they did this on a retreat, but we had three of them. Man oh man, those things were so boring, a piece of LETTUCE might have been more interesting. At least to me.
Now, it was getting dark outside, around 4:00. And it was raining cats and dogs. So you had two options. You could
a) go on a hay ride
b) have free time
Obviously, I chose free time. I which I went down to the basement and played elimination with my friends. Then I went upstiars and drew an AWESOME picture. I'm telling you, this is the best picture of my career. So we had free time for two hours until supper. Supper was, basically, a hot bowl of soup, a piece of kugel, and a heaping plate ful of brisket. Pretty cool. So it was around 8:00 now. We had an activity which was: We were each assigned into little groups, which were then assigned countries. We had to present a banner, skit and food. I was stuck with France, and making the banner. France. Seriously. So I went out in the pouring rain to the gym, where I had very few sharpes to work with. I starting sketching out the Eifel tower and some french flags. Luckily, someone in our group could speak french, and I think that won us th banner award. Or it was some funny thingsI said when presenting it. It could be either. But we won the banner awards.
After this, we sat around the campfire and sang nice songs. And while we were singing nice songs, we cooked smores on the fire. For all you strange people out there who are behind the times, a smore is a gramcracker with meltled chocholate ad marshmallows inside. So anyway, while all this Achdus was happening, someone pulled the prank of the century. I don't know who it was, but SOMEBODY threw a giant rubber tranchula out onto the field, and EVERYBODY screamed their heads off. It was hilarous!!! The tranchula was later found to belong to the management. Funny how that worked out. So I played a soft song on the piano while everyone ate their smores, and then we went to bed. We didn't go to bed I mean, we went back to th lodge. We were SUPPOSED to go to bed, but that's never stopped anyne before. So I went downstairs and played with my friends again. Until the penguin parade showed up. Some girls dressed up as penguins for some reason, and ran around the lodge. So I joined the penguin parade. We paraded around for a good solid hour. I went to go eat some cake and soda after the parade. Then I went to my room to talked even more with my friends to a good 2:00 AM in the morning. At that time, I went into the lobby of the lodge where a strange-dancing-musical kinda movie was playing. To make a long story short, I went to bed at 2:45 AM.
DAY 2)
To make another long story short, we went home.
Breakfast was awesome, pancakes with chocolate melted inside, toast, and strawberries. The bus was three hours late, and I drew another awesome picture.
Well, thatsa my story. Now I have to go, this keyboard is REALLY annoying me.
DAY 1)
A lot of stuuf happened on day 1. Trust me. First of all, before we even got on the bus to get on the resort, my carpool was fifteen minutes late. So I just sat in our living room, thinking it will probably never come and I'll have to spend the whole day at home.
So once, we finally got to TAM, we were just sat around waiting for EVERYONE ELSE to get to tam. So while we were waiting, I thought I'd check out their piano. I play a KILLER piece on piano, let me tell you. Ask Pyschotodler. He can hook you up with one of my master pieces. Unless you live with me. Then get lost. Anyway, I started playing on their piano a really nice song, it was very long though. I didn't even notice the hordes of high-schoolers collecting around me. In fact, I didn't notice until the end, where they all started applauding. It was then I fell off the chair backwards, no joke.
So after the piano incident, we got on the bus. I clocked the ride, it was 3 hours. IT WAS THAT LONG! I think I died a few times, because I rarely remember anything about the ride there except it was extremly boring. So yeah. Escpecially because my entire class was on the other bus, and I somehow got stuck with all the tam girls. So yeah.
Once we finally arrived at "the lodge" we were all assinged our rooms. Luckily for me, I got put in a room with my friends! I even did a little dance. So then we got a few minutes to unpack and get settled. Then we all went downstairs for some speeches that I found quite boring. Then we playd a game where you had to get someone else to answer questions about themselves, but I found that boring also. After that, we went outside to play a game called "Russian Passport." You had to go around to each of the boothes (countries) and do an activity. For each activity, you get a stamp. You win when your card is filled with stamps, but if you run into a "border watch" they take all your stamps away.
After this exciting game, we went to the gym to do literally nothing. I mean, really. We just sat around. So my friends and I took pictures of stuff and a movie of someone putting chopsticks in their hair. Then my friend took a picture of me strangling someone. Yeah....
Then, we ate lunch. Boy, I have never EVER had a lunch so good. I mean, there was Chicago pizza, garlic bread, a salad bar, strawberries with cream, and even dessert! Chocolate ice cream with gram crackers! I mean, this was AMAZING!!!
Then we went to a "workshop". Workshop, is another way of saying "Boring lecture that goes on for an hour." I'm not sure why they did this on a retreat, but we had three of them. Man oh man, those things were so boring, a piece of LETTUCE might have been more interesting. At least to me.
Now, it was getting dark outside, around 4:00. And it was raining cats and dogs. So you had two options. You could
a) go on a hay ride
b) have free time
Obviously, I chose free time. I which I went down to the basement and played elimination with my friends. Then I went upstiars and drew an AWESOME picture. I'm telling you, this is the best picture of my career. So we had free time for two hours until supper. Supper was, basically, a hot bowl of soup, a piece of kugel, and a heaping plate ful of brisket. Pretty cool. So it was around 8:00 now. We had an activity which was: We were each assigned into little groups, which were then assigned countries. We had to present a banner, skit and food. I was stuck with France, and making the banner. France. Seriously. So I went out in the pouring rain to the gym, where I had very few sharpes to work with. I starting sketching out the Eifel tower and some french flags. Luckily, someone in our group could speak french, and I think that won us th banner award. Or it was some funny thingsI said when presenting it. It could be either. But we won the banner awards.
After this, we sat around the campfire and sang nice songs. And while we were singing nice songs, we cooked smores on the fire. For all you strange people out there who are behind the times, a smore is a gramcracker with meltled chocholate ad marshmallows inside. So anyway, while all this Achdus was happening, someone pulled the prank of the century. I don't know who it was, but SOMEBODY threw a giant rubber tranchula out onto the field, and EVERYBODY screamed their heads off. It was hilarous!!! The tranchula was later found to belong to the management. Funny how that worked out. So I played a soft song on the piano while everyone ate their smores, and then we went to bed. We didn't go to bed I mean, we went back to th lodge. We were SUPPOSED to go to bed, but that's never stopped anyne before. So I went downstairs and played with my friends again. Until the penguin parade showed up. Some girls dressed up as penguins for some reason, and ran around the lodge. So I joined the penguin parade. We paraded around for a good solid hour. I went to go eat some cake and soda after the parade. Then I went to my room to talked even more with my friends to a good 2:00 AM in the morning. At that time, I went into the lobby of the lodge where a strange-dancing-musical kinda movie was playing. To make a long story short, I went to bed at 2:45 AM.
DAY 2)
To make another long story short, we went home.
Breakfast was awesome, pancakes with chocolate melted inside, toast, and strawberries. The bus was three hours late, and I drew another awesome picture.
Well, thatsa my story. Now I have to go, this keyboard is REALLY annoying me.
Sunday, November 9, 2008
Oh. Steven.
Okay, so you can barely see it. That's not my fault. But we should concentrate on the fact that I think this is the best picture of my career, and if it was dark enough, I think I'd use it for my avatar. And I drew it ALL BY MYSELF!!! I'M SO HAPPY!!!! Unfourtunatly, the colors didn't come out so great....neither did the pictures.....
you know what? They need to invent better scanners these days!
Saturday, November 1, 2008
CUT!
Hey people? Guess what I have to do?
Yup, you guessed it, I have to write a play! About Korach! Yeah...So here's goes a scene!
(we see Korach (played by short girl with long black hair and cotton ball beard) in dusty tent sitting on a bench. Many bichorim (played by maniacle 1st graders) are gathered at his feet, listening to his speech.)
KORACH: (getting comfortable on bench) So, my young fellows. What's up?
BACHOR #1: the sky?
BACHOR #2: the annania hacovode?
BACHOR #3: gas prices?
KORACH: (sighing) no, no, no. I'd just like to ask you all. Do you like your current jobs?
BACHOR #1: Oh yes, it's very nice.
BACHOR #2: (nodding) yeah, can't complain.
BACHOR #3: mine gives out free sodas!
KORACH: Now think about it. Are these very honorable jobs?
BACHOR #1: nah...
BACHOR #2: not really...
BACHOR #3: (pondering) is being a popcorn vender honorable?
BACHOR #1: no, it kinda makes people want to strangle you.
BACHOR #2: yeah, ecspecially when you scream at the top of your voice 'POPCORN!!!!'
BACHOR #3: Oh...
KORACH: do you think it's unfair that other people get better jobs than you?
BACHOR #1: yeah...
BACHOR #2: uh-huh...
BACHOR #3: I'm hungry!
KORACH: What if I gave you a better job?
BACHOR #1: huh?
BACHOR #2: What kind of job?
BACHOR #3: is it better than being a popcorn vender?
KORACH: Well, say, a job in the mishkan?
BACHOR #1: That would be pretty cool..
BACHOR #2: but I thought Moshe took away our right to work in the mishkan...
BACHOR #3: I wonder if they would let me sell popcorn INSIDE the mishkan...
KORACH: Exactly. Moshe took away your right to work in the mishkan and gave it to the leviyim. Do you know why?
BACHOR #1: no, why?
BACHOR #2: why?
BACHOR #3: didn't it have something to do with the golden whats-it thing?
KORACH: (ignoring bachor #3) because HE's a levi, and his BROTHER is a levi. Moshe wanted all the glory, and he wanted glory for his brother also, so he took away your kahoona.
BACHOR #1 & 2: gasp!
BACHOR #3: but I thought he was our leader!
KORACH: If I were leader, I would make sure the bachorim would get all the honor, and you wouldn't be stuck with lowly jobs like a popcorn vender!
BACHOR #1: yeah!
BACHOR #2: let's go! Down with Moshe!
KORACH: yes...join me, and together we will rule the galaxy!!!!
BACHORIM: (confused)
KORACH: sorry, just my alter ego, there....
BACHOR #1: anyway, he's right! Moshe cheated us!
BACHOR #2: Yeah! Vote Korach!
BACHOR #3: Down with the emperor!!
BACHORIM & KORACH: (staring blankly at #3)
KORACH: there's work to be done! Come my fellow citizens!
(we see KORACH and BACHORIM 1 &2 march off out of the tent. 3 is left standing there)
BACHOR #3: um...
(awkard silence)
BACHOR #3: yeah.......I'm still cool....
(end scene)
by the way, i'm pretty sure bachor #3 was the voice of reason. I have the sudden urge to gnaw my fingers.
Yup, you guessed it, I have to write a play! About Korach! Yeah...So here's goes a scene!
(we see Korach (played by short girl with long black hair and cotton ball beard) in dusty tent sitting on a bench. Many bichorim (played by maniacle 1st graders) are gathered at his feet, listening to his speech.)
KORACH: (getting comfortable on bench) So, my young fellows. What's up?
BACHOR #1: the sky?
BACHOR #2: the annania hacovode?
BACHOR #3: gas prices?
KORACH: (sighing) no, no, no. I'd just like to ask you all. Do you like your current jobs?
BACHOR #1: Oh yes, it's very nice.
BACHOR #2: (nodding) yeah, can't complain.
BACHOR #3: mine gives out free sodas!
KORACH: Now think about it. Are these very honorable jobs?
BACHOR #1: nah...
BACHOR #2: not really...
BACHOR #3: (pondering) is being a popcorn vender honorable?
BACHOR #1: no, it kinda makes people want to strangle you.
BACHOR #2: yeah, ecspecially when you scream at the top of your voice 'POPCORN!!!!'
BACHOR #3: Oh...
KORACH: do you think it's unfair that other people get better jobs than you?
BACHOR #1: yeah...
BACHOR #2: uh-huh...
BACHOR #3: I'm hungry!
KORACH: What if I gave you a better job?
BACHOR #1: huh?
BACHOR #2: What kind of job?
BACHOR #3: is it better than being a popcorn vender?
KORACH: Well, say, a job in the mishkan?
BACHOR #1: That would be pretty cool..
BACHOR #2: but I thought Moshe took away our right to work in the mishkan...
BACHOR #3: I wonder if they would let me sell popcorn INSIDE the mishkan...
KORACH: Exactly. Moshe took away your right to work in the mishkan and gave it to the leviyim. Do you know why?
BACHOR #1: no, why?
BACHOR #2: why?
BACHOR #3: didn't it have something to do with the golden whats-it thing?
KORACH: (ignoring bachor #3) because HE's a levi, and his BROTHER is a levi. Moshe wanted all the glory, and he wanted glory for his brother also, so he took away your kahoona.
BACHOR #1 & 2: gasp!
BACHOR #3: but I thought he was our leader!
KORACH: If I were leader, I would make sure the bachorim would get all the honor, and you wouldn't be stuck with lowly jobs like a popcorn vender!
BACHOR #1: yeah!
BACHOR #2: let's go! Down with Moshe!
KORACH: yes...join me, and together we will rule the galaxy!!!!
BACHORIM: (confused)
KORACH: sorry, just my alter ego, there....
BACHOR #1: anyway, he's right! Moshe cheated us!
BACHOR #2: Yeah! Vote Korach!
BACHOR #3: Down with the emperor!!
BACHORIM & KORACH: (staring blankly at #3)
KORACH: there's work to be done! Come my fellow citizens!
(we see KORACH and BACHORIM 1 &2 march off out of the tent. 3 is left standing there)
BACHOR #3: um...
(awkard silence)
BACHOR #3: yeah.......I'm still cool....
(end scene)
by the way, i'm pretty sure bachor #3 was the voice of reason. I have the sudden urge to gnaw my fingers.
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Ha-artwork Sheli!!!!
IT'S COMING!!!!!
Just be patient! i am currently locked in a battle of wits with Mrs.B's picture scanner-thingy. hoLD ON!!!!
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Downloads 'n' stuff!!
Like the 'n'? I HATE those things! I find them on teh backs of cereal boxes all the time! Anyway, these past few days I have been struggling to re-download all the stuff back onto my computer after Rafi blew up the previous one. Yeah. Blew up. Can you believe that guy? No really, he didn't blow it up. SORRY RAFI, I DIDN'T MEAN IT!
Anyway, I used to have a kickawesome compy over here, on this white desk in that little corner of the basement and it had all kinds of cool stuff. A word processer, animation builder, slow graphics, no memory, and other cool things. But best of all was the games. That old thing could run games from 1985! and I had about a gazillion of them:
Laura Bow 1
Laura Bow 2
King's Quest 4
Sailor Moon: The Moon Princess
Klik 'n' play
hungry hedgehogs! (helped pt with her math skills!)
So one day I come home and see Rafi disassembling the compy. He tells me he is upgrading. Well, here I am, clackety-claking on the new comps, and it's not half bad, I can't complain. The only downside is that now all my old games are GONE!! So I have to find them again, and make them compatable to the system. Wish me luck!!
Plus, I got tons of sweet music.....(shifts eyes nervously)...want some?
Anyway, I used to have a kickawesome compy over here, on this white desk in that little corner of the basement and it had all kinds of cool stuff. A word processer, animation builder, slow graphics, no memory, and other cool things. But best of all was the games. That old thing could run games from 1985! and I had about a gazillion of them:
Laura Bow 1
Laura Bow 2
King's Quest 4
Sailor Moon: The Moon Princess
Klik 'n' play
hungry hedgehogs! (helped pt with her math skills!)
So one day I come home and see Rafi disassembling the compy. He tells me he is upgrading. Well, here I am, clackety-claking on the new comps, and it's not half bad, I can't complain. The only downside is that now all my old games are GONE!! So I have to find them again, and make them compatable to the system. Wish me luck!!
Plus, I got tons of sweet music.....(shifts eyes nervously)...want some?
Saturday, October 4, 2008
Thinking about writing stuff
Guess who feels like writing a short anecdote for absolutely no reason at all? No, it was me. I like writing, and I'm always looking for ways to improve, but I have a teensy problem. I don't like it when people criticize my writing. It discourages me. So right around now, 7:59 pm Saturday night, I am sitting at the white desk in the basement, bundled up in a fluffy quilt because the basement (cellar?) is very very cold, my long, bony fingers tapping the rusty (do keyboards rust?), definitely inoperable keys of the compy, as the pt attempts to play The Sims2, and talk to herself. Sometimes she talks to me, but that's only when she either wants to complain about something, or show me her unique taste in furniture and interior design (prison camp). Currently, she is creating her family, starting with the family name. The Snore family. As of three minutes ago, it consists of a single adult female proudly christened 'Rhino'. But enough about the pt, there is something I forgot to mention. I'm in my pajamas. Now I would really like to be in my shabbos robe, but due to the forces of nature, who continue to mock me, my robe has fallen into a toilet. So yeah. I bet you're all wondering how that happened, so I will tell you in my crisp anecdote writing properties:
Flash back italic font!!!!
I laughed tiredly as I thrust my ice-cold key into the lock of our front door. After an exhausting day with my friends, I was about ready to 'retire for the evening,' and finish reading my hilarious Dave Barry book, while enjoying the comfort of my blue and white velvet Shabbos robe, which despite having several holes in it, still holds an admirable position of "good as new!". The comforting heat of the house welcomed me as the door slowly creaked open, and I escaped the evening chill. I quickly unzipped my jacked and tossed it on the couch, stretching my stiff arms, tired from being jammed in my pockets the whole walk home. I was rather exhausted and hot, so I decided 'now' was a good time to execute my plan. I slipped out of my 'somewhat two sizes too big' hand-me-down shoes and jogged up the stairs to my room. Since I had not used the bathroom since lunch that day, and it was 6:05 pm, I figured it would be a good time to use it while I changed. So I take my robe down from its hanger, and take my 'medical-required (yes I'm stretching the truth)-back-brace-enduring-super-stretchy-shirt to put under it and began my three foot march to the upstairs bathroom. But in the five seconds it would have taken me to get to it, my father somehow beat me to it and locked the door.
"Rats," I muttered, "I guess I'll have to go downstairs then..."
(yes I talk to myself, but that's okay!) So I go back downstairs and head to the bathroom. Getting inside, I lock the door. Now let me cover the schematics of this here bathroom. It's about two feet wide. It's got a toilet and a sink, both crammed into each other. Clearly there was no room to change in here, but that's never stopped me before. So I put my robe in the sink (which was dry, thankfully) and did my business. Like an ordinary person, (excluding the pt) I washed my hands and flushed. However, as I was washing my hands, with soap I might add, mother nature lashed out at me and caused my robe to tip over sideways towards the toilet, just it began the clean water began to bubble up at the top and it emits a kind of 'sigh' only another toilet could understand.
"No!!" I moan in slow motion as the head of my robe thrusts itself into the water, instantly soaking itself. With my dripping wet hands, I grasp the end of the robe, but alas, it is too late.
"NOOOOOOOO!!!!" I scream as I hold the robe in my arms like a dying child. "WHY?!!!" My plans for this evening have been permanently canceled, going on vacation somewhere with my dignity. Because ironically, this same situation happened to the pt a few weeks ago where somehow her skirt fell in the toilet, although I don't know the details there. Wearing my brace shirt, I gather up the dirty clothes and beautiful, but now toilet-stained robe, and sadly toss them down the chute.
"At least the water was clean..." I grumble. At this point I stomp downstairs to go get some pants, as shabbos would be over in about forty-five minutes, I thought wearing pants for the rest of it would be considered OK. Then I flop down on the spare bed in the basement and begin to mourn the loss of such a beautiful robe, which I went through tons of trouble to sort out and clean after Rosh Hashana.
Well, that's that. I wish to inform all you readers out there that the robe is making a steady recovery, and should be back by yom kipur.
Flash back italic font!!!!
I laughed tiredly as I thrust my ice-cold key into the lock of our front door. After an exhausting day with my friends, I was about ready to 'retire for the evening,' and finish reading my hilarious Dave Barry book, while enjoying the comfort of my blue and white velvet Shabbos robe, which despite having several holes in it, still holds an admirable position of "good as new!". The comforting heat of the house welcomed me as the door slowly creaked open, and I escaped the evening chill. I quickly unzipped my jacked and tossed it on the couch, stretching my stiff arms, tired from being jammed in my pockets the whole walk home. I was rather exhausted and hot, so I decided 'now' was a good time to execute my plan. I slipped out of my 'somewhat two sizes too big' hand-me-down shoes and jogged up the stairs to my room. Since I had not used the bathroom since lunch that day, and it was 6:05 pm, I figured it would be a good time to use it while I changed. So I take my robe down from its hanger, and take my 'medical-required (yes I'm stretching the truth)-back-brace-enduring-super-stretchy-shirt to put under it and began my three foot march to the upstairs bathroom. But in the five seconds it would have taken me to get to it, my father somehow beat me to it and locked the door.
"Rats," I muttered, "I guess I'll have to go downstairs then..."
(yes I talk to myself, but that's okay!) So I go back downstairs and head to the bathroom. Getting inside, I lock the door. Now let me cover the schematics of this here bathroom. It's about two feet wide. It's got a toilet and a sink, both crammed into each other. Clearly there was no room to change in here, but that's never stopped me before. So I put my robe in the sink (which was dry, thankfully) and did my business. Like an ordinary person, (excluding the pt) I washed my hands and flushed. However, as I was washing my hands, with soap I might add, mother nature lashed out at me and caused my robe to tip over sideways towards the toilet, just it began the clean water began to bubble up at the top and it emits a kind of 'sigh' only another toilet could understand.
"No!!" I moan in slow motion as the head of my robe thrusts itself into the water, instantly soaking itself. With my dripping wet hands, I grasp the end of the robe, but alas, it is too late.
"NOOOOOOOO!!!!" I scream as I hold the robe in my arms like a dying child. "WHY?!!!" My plans for this evening have been permanently canceled, going on vacation somewhere with my dignity. Because ironically, this same situation happened to the pt a few weeks ago where somehow her skirt fell in the toilet, although I don't know the details there. Wearing my brace shirt, I gather up the dirty clothes and beautiful, but now toilet-stained robe, and sadly toss them down the chute.
"At least the water was clean..." I grumble. At this point I stomp downstairs to go get some pants, as shabbos would be over in about forty-five minutes, I thought wearing pants for the rest of it would be considered OK. Then I flop down on the spare bed in the basement and begin to mourn the loss of such a beautiful robe, which I went through tons of trouble to sort out and clean after Rosh Hashana.
Well, that's that. I wish to inform all you readers out there that the robe is making a steady recovery, and should be back by yom kipur.
Thursday, October 2, 2008
Saturday, September 27, 2008
An ode to autumn
A poem I wrote during LA.
The leaves blow past,
A rainbow of colors,
the crisp wind blows sharp and fast,
the grass snuggles under,
a blanket of leaves,
as the tree grows bear at last.
Squirrels can be seen,
scurrying about,
collecting food for the winter,
one climbs up a hollow tree,
a stack of nuts peeks out from behind her.
the honking of geese,
can be heard from above,
chatting endlessly as they fly,
almost as if they too are remembering,
memories of a summer gone by.
Some children play while others work,
raking the endless leaves,
mothers bundle them up warmly,
in coats, sweaters, and flease.
Autumn is a beautiful season,
filled with gold, silver and bronze,
I only hope its beauty stays frozen,
in my mind, forever and always....
The leaves blow past,
A rainbow of colors,
the crisp wind blows sharp and fast,
the grass snuggles under,
a blanket of leaves,
as the tree grows bear at last.
Squirrels can be seen,
scurrying about,
collecting food for the winter,
one climbs up a hollow tree,
a stack of nuts peeks out from behind her.
the honking of geese,
can be heard from above,
chatting endlessly as they fly,
almost as if they too are remembering,
memories of a summer gone by.
Some children play while others work,
raking the endless leaves,
mothers bundle them up warmly,
in coats, sweaters, and flease.
Autumn is a beautiful season,
filled with gold, silver and bronze,
I only hope its beauty stays frozen,
in my mind, forever and always....
Thursday, September 25, 2008
I'm back!!!!!
I'm back! And improved in many ways! How do you like the make-over? I decided the stuff from last year was slightly boring. Wow, am I GLAD to be out of 6th grade! That place stunk, majorly. 7th grade is WAY more awesome. My favorite privilege, of the many I have been granted, is two break periods instead of recess!! Really now, I didn't need recess. Break is awesome! It's just us, 8th grade, and the 3rd floor, no midget 5th graders moving around. You can do anything! Mostly, I go to 8th grade and play piano, or screw up their computers. That's fun! Other times I head over to the ol' bean bag and take a hearty nap. Yeah, someone brought in a plush purple bean bag, and I LOVE that thing. I sleep on it sometimes. The other thing I like is being heralded by queen by the younger grades. Why is it everyone looks up to 7th graders? Well, somehow I seem to have accumulated my own fanclub, because everywhere I go I have 5th, 4th, and sometimes even 3RD graders on my tail. They're always trying to get a peek in my sketch diary, where I keep my AMAZING TOO COOL pictures that I draw during class. Someday I'll get them up here, you just wait. So anyway, I usually have to shoo them off with a broom or something, because if I don't, they keep telling me:
"Wow!"
"They're SOOO GOOD!!"
"How'd you learn to draw like that? Did you take lessons?"
I just don't have the heart to tell them all off, though. Whatever. More cool things about 7g. I get to write a lot more! I love writing, especially short stories and such.
On a slightly different note, Fudge came home today. Yay! Don't tell her I said that though....Nah, she doesn't check this blog anyway. Phew! I wonder what she thinks about me....When I cleaned the house a while ago, she seemed pretty happy. Whatever, it's not like she's gonna be here that long, right? I bet I'm feeling happy she's home because I've spent at least 4 break periods trying to piece together her yearbook. The pages are just kind of fluttering around 8th grade, trying to get me to catch them and stuff them in a bag. Which I might do. Someday. All the people in that thing are like, MARRIED! Some of them are even working in the actual school!
I plan to pour my feelings into this blog, and exercise my 1st person writing skills. If I even have any. I have REALLY good 3rd person skills, I know that! But writing a blog in 3rd person would be kind of awkward.
Bye bye!
"Wow!"
"They're SOOO GOOD!!"
"How'd you learn to draw like that? Did you take lessons?"
I just don't have the heart to tell them all off, though. Whatever. More cool things about 7g. I get to write a lot more! I love writing, especially short stories and such.
On a slightly different note, Fudge came home today. Yay! Don't tell her I said that though....Nah, she doesn't check this blog anyway. Phew! I wonder what she thinks about me....When I cleaned the house a while ago, she seemed pretty happy. Whatever, it's not like she's gonna be here that long, right? I bet I'm feeling happy she's home because I've spent at least 4 break periods trying to piece together her yearbook. The pages are just kind of fluttering around 8th grade, trying to get me to catch them and stuff them in a bag. Which I might do. Someday. All the people in that thing are like, MARRIED! Some of them are even working in the actual school!
I plan to pour my feelings into this blog, and exercise my 1st person writing skills. If I even have any. I have REALLY good 3rd person skills, I know that! But writing a blog in 3rd person would be kind of awkward.
Bye bye!
Thursday, July 3, 2008
The lil navigator
As I may have already said, I'm going to university school now, and it's VERY hard to get to. Okay, not THAT hard, but pretty hard because it's really far away and there are a lot of different key turns and ramps that we keep missing. Everyday, either fudge, rafiki, or 30.cal will drive the PT and me to school. (yes that is correct grammer). However, today was different. I know how to get there because I've memorized already the turns and everything, but my brother wasn't quite sure. For some reason, he forgot which turn to take and we drove for 15 minutes in the opposite direction we were supposed to be going.
"er...Are you sure we're supposed to be going this way? I'm pretty sure we should've been going north on sherman..."
said I.
"Really?" said my brother.
"Oh boy! Look at that gas meter!"
Yes indeed we were nearly out of gas. So we stopped at a gas station, my bro got out and I think he tried to hook up the gas pipe to the car when a loud beeping noise emitted from the machine. He re-entered the car a moment later and said:
"This gas station doesn't work, let's try another one."
So we keep looking and we find another one eventually. We spent a total of three seconds in there when we figured out the pumps all said
"NO CARD, CASH ONLY"
So we kept looking, the gas meter dwindling all the way. At this point, I was very concerned. It was 9:00, we were at least three miles in the wrong direction, and out of gas. Of course none of this bothered the PT.
"Are we there yet?" she asked repeatdly, "When are we gonna get there? Helllllllloooooooo!!!!????"
Eventually we found a working gas station. However, we were there for at least twenty minutes because the attendant wouldn't let my brother pay for the gas with my father's card because, quote 'you not him!'. All this time, I was trying to entertain the PT by singing "banana phone."
me: ring ring ring ring ring ring ring, banana phone!
pt: er....
me: ping pong ping pong ping pong ping, ponana phone!
pt: um...
me: I've got this feeeeling, it's so a-pealing,
pt: er..this is boring
me: for all of us to get together and sing, SING!
pt: singing is boring, iguana
me: ring ring ring ring ring ring ring, banana phone!
pt: STOP! I don't even know the words to this song!
me: oh.
pt: look, iguana, why don't we just sit around and do nothing, okay?
me: but that's BORING!
pt: well, that's what I wanna do, so we're gonna do it, OKAY?!
me: all right....
Sooner or later, bro showed up and I directed him to the right track and we got to camp an hour later. Happy ending!
"er...Are you sure we're supposed to be going this way? I'm pretty sure we should've been going north on sherman..."
said I.
"Really?" said my brother.
"Oh boy! Look at that gas meter!"
Yes indeed we were nearly out of gas. So we stopped at a gas station, my bro got out and I think he tried to hook up the gas pipe to the car when a loud beeping noise emitted from the machine. He re-entered the car a moment later and said:
"This gas station doesn't work, let's try another one."
So we keep looking and we find another one eventually. We spent a total of three seconds in there when we figured out the pumps all said
"NO CARD, CASH ONLY"
So we kept looking, the gas meter dwindling all the way. At this point, I was very concerned. It was 9:00, we were at least three miles in the wrong direction, and out of gas. Of course none of this bothered the PT.
"Are we there yet?" she asked repeatdly, "When are we gonna get there? Helllllllloooooooo!!!!????"
Eventually we found a working gas station. However, we were there for at least twenty minutes because the attendant wouldn't let my brother pay for the gas with my father's card because, quote 'you not him!'. All this time, I was trying to entertain the PT by singing "banana phone."
me: ring ring ring ring ring ring ring, banana phone!
pt: er....
me: ping pong ping pong ping pong ping, ponana phone!
pt: um...
me: I've got this feeeeling, it's so a-pealing,
pt: er..this is boring
me: for all of us to get together and sing, SING!
pt: singing is boring, iguana
me: ring ring ring ring ring ring ring, banana phone!
pt: STOP! I don't even know the words to this song!
me: oh.
pt: look, iguana, why don't we just sit around and do nothing, okay?
me: but that's BORING!
pt: well, that's what I wanna do, so we're gonna do it, OKAY?!
me: all right....
Sooner or later, bro showed up and I directed him to the right track and we got to camp an hour later. Happy ending!
Saturday, June 28, 2008
skirts, knees, and a bit of black magic
First off, I have a strike that last one. There will be no movie, because PT and outofammo really didn't want to. Or it may be the other way around, but anyway, the movie isn't coming. Sorry folks!
Second off, I have a problem. Summer is all up ons, and I'm definatly NOT going to wear a long black, cotton skirt. So around the time of the WITS graduation, Mrs.B took me shopping (although this was HER idea, not mine). We got all kinds of short skirts that I thought were really perky. We got a blue one, a tan one, a pink one, and a black and white one. I tried them on, and they kinda of fell down my waist, but it was okay with me. They still fit, and I was REAL happy. So the next shabbos I proudly wore the tan skirt and a buttoned pink shirt. At first, I really liked the length, how it wasn't too long, or too short. But Mrs.B saw how it looked and said it was sagging to one side, so she pinned it up. We stabbed it with three pins, and they did manage to make the skirt feel really tight, but also really short. When we got to shull, I was really nervous. I thought the skirt was ridiculosly short and that everyone could see past my knees, which isn't tzinious. I was always in the bathroom adjusting it, and it's getting me really paranoid, But I really like the style of the skirt, and it was SOOO cute!
Those who have experience with short skirt problems, please advise. I know this isn't the way you're supposed to post on a blog, but I'm desperate! I want to see what other people think because whenever I ask my family they all tell me 'no, it fits perfectly.'
Second off, I have a problem. Summer is all up ons, and I'm definatly NOT going to wear a long black, cotton skirt. So around the time of the WITS graduation, Mrs.B took me shopping (although this was HER idea, not mine). We got all kinds of short skirts that I thought were really perky. We got a blue one, a tan one, a pink one, and a black and white one. I tried them on, and they kinda of fell down my waist, but it was okay with me. They still fit, and I was REAL happy. So the next shabbos I proudly wore the tan skirt and a buttoned pink shirt. At first, I really liked the length, how it wasn't too long, or too short. But Mrs.B saw how it looked and said it was sagging to one side, so she pinned it up. We stabbed it with three pins, and they did manage to make the skirt feel really tight, but also really short. When we got to shull, I was really nervous. I thought the skirt was ridiculosly short and that everyone could see past my knees, which isn't tzinious. I was always in the bathroom adjusting it, and it's getting me really paranoid, But I really like the style of the skirt, and it was SOOO cute!
Those who have experience with short skirt problems, please advise. I know this isn't the way you're supposed to post on a blog, but I'm desperate! I want to see what other people think because whenever I ask my family they all tell me 'no, it fits perfectly.'
Thursday, June 26, 2008
Coming soon....
I'm in university school right now as I'm typing this. We have to make a movie and still have twenty minutes left of class. Here's what I'M doing for my movie.
COOL GUY (PT) VS THE EVIL GRIL (outofammo).
It's gonna be the best thing ever! I don't know where to shoot though. I was thinking of going to YES to shoot now that there arn't any classes there now, but no. I've just decided, I'm going to shoot in our backyard.
COMING SOON....
COOL GUY (PT) VS THE EVIL GRIL (outofammo).
It's gonna be the best thing ever! I don't know where to shoot though. I was thinking of going to YES to shoot now that there arn't any classes there now, but no. I've just decided, I'm going to shoot in our backyard.
COMING SOON....
Tuesday, June 3, 2008
The end is near!
This is a cause for celebration! The school year is ending! Unfourtunatly, the school feels before the student's hour of freedom, they must undergo the torture and agony of before the end of school exams! this is a cause for hiding under the bed and refusing to go to school until the revolution comes. Or at least until 3:30 comes. Anyway, these papers of pain are the last tests before school is over. In my case, I have to study for ALL my subjects in one night the day before testing. I guess most people plan study groups or review sheets, or study every night for a week before a test or something, but I guess I'm not one of those sensible people.
However, this is only half of the problem. Since I enjoy writing anicdotes instead of just plain stating my ideas, the following is what I imiagine the last day of school will be like:
BBBBBRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAANNNNNGG!!! Finally, the bell rang. At 1:30, the final bell of the year had finally rang for Yeshiva Elementary School, and it was as if everyone could here it. On the third floor of the building, in the 6th grade classroom, chaos reinged supreme. Most of the girls were dancing and screaming 'schools out!' Some girls were huddled in a corner by the open window casually talking about plans for the summer, and even more girls were packing their bags and joking among themselves as if a normal school day had just ended and they were to go home and do tons of homework. I was probably in the last group. Quietly, I slung my backpack over my shoulders and left the classroom I had learned in for the past ten months. I opened the door of the stairway and raced down the steps, suddenly running at the speed of light. It had finally dawned on me that school was over and I wouldn't be coming back until next year, and then it'd be in the 7th grade classroom with all new teachers and classmates.
I burst out the entrance to the school building and met the warm breeze of the outdoors. The sun shone and there was not a cloud in the sky, the perfect day. The PT sat frowning in a corner.
"I've been waiting here for a million years!" she pouted, "you could have at least TOLD me you'd be taking forever!"
Too happy to be annoyed, I grabbed her hand and cheerfully skipped away from the school I had come to so many times. Soon we got home and once I'd reached the door I threw down my backpack, sped up the stairs to my room and took off my school uniform as if it was made of poisen. Personally, I hate uniforms, they're such a drag to wash and look after. Not to mention them being ugly half the time! I changed into play clothes and sat down on my bed for a second. Then I remembered. The happiness that had welled up inside me diminished in an instant. My stomach did a flip-flop as I remembered: I was starting university school next week anyway. I fell back onto my bed and groaned. Guess you can't outrun school after all!
However, this is only half of the problem. Since I enjoy writing anicdotes instead of just plain stating my ideas, the following is what I imiagine the last day of school will be like:
BBBBBRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAANNNNNGG!!! Finally, the bell rang. At 1:30, the final bell of the year had finally rang for Yeshiva Elementary School, and it was as if everyone could here it. On the third floor of the building, in the 6th grade classroom, chaos reinged supreme. Most of the girls were dancing and screaming 'schools out!' Some girls were huddled in a corner by the open window casually talking about plans for the summer, and even more girls were packing their bags and joking among themselves as if a normal school day had just ended and they were to go home and do tons of homework. I was probably in the last group. Quietly, I slung my backpack over my shoulders and left the classroom I had learned in for the past ten months. I opened the door of the stairway and raced down the steps, suddenly running at the speed of light. It had finally dawned on me that school was over and I wouldn't be coming back until next year, and then it'd be in the 7th grade classroom with all new teachers and classmates.
I burst out the entrance to the school building and met the warm breeze of the outdoors. The sun shone and there was not a cloud in the sky, the perfect day. The PT sat frowning in a corner.
"I've been waiting here for a million years!" she pouted, "you could have at least TOLD me you'd be taking forever!"
Too happy to be annoyed, I grabbed her hand and cheerfully skipped away from the school I had come to so many times. Soon we got home and once I'd reached the door I threw down my backpack, sped up the stairs to my room and took off my school uniform as if it was made of poisen. Personally, I hate uniforms, they're such a drag to wash and look after. Not to mention them being ugly half the time! I changed into play clothes and sat down on my bed for a second. Then I remembered. The happiness that had welled up inside me diminished in an instant. My stomach did a flip-flop as I remembered: I was starting university school next week anyway. I fell back onto my bed and groaned. Guess you can't outrun school after all!
Sunday, May 25, 2008
Nuthing lik a colr war
Since everyone else seems to have already written a PT book, I thought I'd give it a shot. See, 5-8 grade girls recently had a color war (which I was in), so I thought it'd make pretty good for booking (whatever). Here goes!
Nuthing lik a colr war
by igwana
this book belogs to igwana
In the morning, I cheer
My tem dosnt lik to, not vere
the cheerledrs sleep late.
I forgt to poot on my costum
My captn gets mad.
"war aaa my lines is?"
"back in tem bas, that is war it is"
(What's going on on this page?)
(That's me klutzing out during our team themesong)
(What's going on in the cage?)
(that's the judge cage)
(the judge cage?)
(Yeah! the judges like to be up there!)
"AAA!"
"dont wory, we dont hav to memoriz them al today"
(Here I am praticing our cheer)
"Hmm?"
"Wat cind of scor is this?"
"You didnt get a good scor on this gam"
"WUAT?!"
(What's happening on this page?)
(Oh boy, are you gonna quit the team? Do you wanna cheat?)
(No, I think I will stay on the team.)
(What's happening on the next page?)
(dreaming...do..dooo.do..doo..)
(What are you dreaming of?)
(she's dreaming her captains weren't late to the field)
"Urg, wi do i keep getting bad scors?"
"Probabli becuz you dont hav enuf achdoos"
"Hmm...Mabe your cheers ar good
F for 'forgot my lins'
A for 'a jiant hedace.'"
Colr war is mor important
every other day!
Nuthing lik a colr war
by igwana
this book belogs to igwana
In the morning, I cheer
My tem dosnt lik to, not vere
the cheerledrs sleep late.
I forgt to poot on my costum
My captn gets mad.
"war aaa my lines is?"
"back in tem bas, that is war it is"
(What's going on on this page?)
(That's me klutzing out during our team themesong)
(What's going on in the cage?)
(that's the judge cage)
(the judge cage?)
(Yeah! the judges like to be up there!)
"AAA!"
"dont wory, we dont hav to memoriz them al today"
(Here I am praticing our cheer)
"Hmm?"
"Wat cind of scor is this?"
"You didnt get a good scor on this gam"
"WUAT?!"
(What's happening on this page?)
(Oh boy, are you gonna quit the team? Do you wanna cheat?)
(No, I think I will stay on the team.)
(What's happening on the next page?)
(dreaming...do..dooo.do..doo..)
(What are you dreaming of?)
(she's dreaming her captains weren't late to the field)
"Urg, wi do i keep getting bad scors?"
"Probabli becuz you dont hav enuf achdoos"
"Hmm...Mabe your cheers ar good
F for 'forgot my lins'
A for 'a jiant hedace.'"
Colr war is mor important
every other day!
Wednesday, May 7, 2008
It's a bird, it's a plane, it's.....
It's all of them!!!Sorry, I just couldn't resist!
I bet I'll regret this later, but whatever. It was fun!
Center- Serena/ Sailor Moon
bottom right- Mina/ Sailor Venus
bottem left- Lita/ Sailor Jupiter
top left- Amy/ Sailor Mercury
top right- Ray/ Sailor Mars
Thursday, April 3, 2008
Brace yourself!
I have gone to the hospital recently. I have also gotten some X-rays recently. Noticed where I'm going with this? Anyways, I have a 'special gene-'disease'' called scoliosis. I think my brother has it, not very. Scoliosis means 'deformed spine' or something like that, but in any case, my spine has got the wrong idea. It thinks that it's supposed to grow to the right for some reason. No matter how much willpower I put into the matter, my stubborn spine will keep on growing backwards, so we'll have to do something about it! Yes that's right, I need a brace. Actually, I already have the brace, and I've been wearing it for a few nights. It's 'Charleston bending nocturnal brace'. That means I only have to wear it at night for a modest 8 hours. Nothing I can't handle. I snap it on with its totally necessary 5 straps and look in the mirror. Much to my surprise, my head is where I expect it to be, but my legs are barely even on the mirror. I am tilting at like a 30 degree angle here. At least, I think I am, I got an A- on my last geometry test. So I shuffled back to my room and tried to climb into bed. Let me say that it is EXTREMELY hard to move around without bending your back in any way. Try it if you don't believe me. So, once I had staggered into bed, I fell asleep, which was surprisingly easy. 2 hours later, I woke up with a screaming desire to take off my brace. This probably had something to do with the killing pain in my side. I ripped the brace off and realized my chest and abdominal area (or thorax as the doctors say) was unusually sweaty. I remember the doctor telling me the brace is supposed to squeeze me so tight, water comes out the other end. 'Expect to loose some weight' he had grinned ' a lot of it'. I have to wear this thing for at least 4 months.
"Could this go on all day and night? It could, you know, and it just might!"
-PD Eastman. Or Doctor Seuss, I don't remember.
"Could this go on all day and night? It could, you know, and it just might!"
-PD Eastman. Or Doctor Seuss, I don't remember.
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
An ode to spring
puddles, puddles, all around,
during spring rains, they can be found,
my little sister jumps about,
landing in the muddiest one, SPLOUCH!
the trees are growing green,
they grow bigger with each passing week,
my sister enjoys trees,
she hugs them rather than play hide-and-seek,
the birds return,
and sing new songs,
my sister points and runs,
singing along,
we sees squirrels climbing,
into the shade of the leaves,
I hear my sister remark,
'is that the chupah?' gleefully,
we ride our bikes,
the wind roars in my ears,
but my sister announces her dislikes,
"the ground is too disagreeable year!"
I see my sister in the backyard,
on the swings, she plays,
while she talks to herself,
about a coloring book maze,
I make my school lunch,
as the spring sun sets,
my sister sits near, hands on her hips,
"what a nice view!" she nipped
This is my ode to spring,
a poem if you will,
spring can be beautiful,
and the PT, wackier still..
during spring rains, they can be found,
my little sister jumps about,
landing in the muddiest one, SPLOUCH!
the trees are growing green,
they grow bigger with each passing week,
my sister enjoys trees,
she hugs them rather than play hide-and-seek,
the birds return,
and sing new songs,
my sister points and runs,
singing along,
we sees squirrels climbing,
into the shade of the leaves,
I hear my sister remark,
'is that the chupah?' gleefully,
we ride our bikes,
the wind roars in my ears,
but my sister announces her dislikes,
"the ground is too disagreeable year!"
I see my sister in the backyard,
on the swings, she plays,
while she talks to herself,
about a coloring book maze,
I make my school lunch,
as the spring sun sets,
my sister sits near, hands on her hips,
"what a nice view!" she nipped
This is my ode to spring,
a poem if you will,
spring can be beautiful,
and the PT, wackier still..
Monday, March 17, 2008
Kriah-blunders
I was reading Kriah with the PT one night, and she wasn't pronouncing the Shvah-nas. So I tried to show her how to do it.
"Here the PT, watch. You go cRIah......tiZIveh......kaMIno...
"Um, iguana? I think you're being too dramatic about this."
"Here the PT, watch. You go cRIah......tiZIveh......kaMIno...
"Um, iguana? I think you're being too dramatic about this."
Friday, March 14, 2008
A piggybank of world-breaking proportions
Lately the PT has been scourging the house at questionable hours talking to herself. I decided to investigate before the usual police riot of having to put her to bed. As I sneaked in the shadows, following her every footstep, I was able to pick up some of her lines;
"No, this one won't do at all"
"What does a girl have to do to get a decent one these days?"
"Hmm....I haven't tried iguana's room. Let's try there"
What was she looking for? The question rang in my head. I tiptoed upstairs, as I knew that was her next destination. I crept into my room and hid in the closet. Soon, the PT entered the room, and shouted a few times;
"HEEEEEEELLLLLOOOOOOOO?!"
My parents were out for the night, and when the PT got no response after five or six yodels, she fell silent and flicked on the room's light. She dug around my drawers until finally she let out a triumphant "ah-ha!". I slipped closer to the closet door to see what she had discovered, and she clutched in her hands a small purse. She pounded the purse a few times with her fist, and threw it around the room, enjoying the tingling sound my spare change made inside. Finally, she unzipped the small purse and remarked:
"Hmm....Well, I don't know who's money this is, but I can take it!"
The next morning, I awoke to see the PT sitting calmly on my legs, apparently waiting for me to wake up. She noticed me and screamed "iguana, my wallet is gone!"
I sat up and blinked a few times.
"You had a wallet?"
"Duh! Didn't you ever notice!?"
"um...no....?"
"well, anyway, it's gone! I had all my money in there too!"
"how much money did you have?"
"er....about three pennies, a quarter, and a dime. THAT'S A LOT OF MONEY IGUANA!"
"okay, okay, I'll help you find it."
And the great journey began.....
"No, this one won't do at all"
"What does a girl have to do to get a decent one these days?"
"Hmm....I haven't tried iguana's room. Let's try there"
What was she looking for? The question rang in my head. I tiptoed upstairs, as I knew that was her next destination. I crept into my room and hid in the closet. Soon, the PT entered the room, and shouted a few times;
"HEEEEEEELLLLLOOOOOOOO?!"
My parents were out for the night, and when the PT got no response after five or six yodels, she fell silent and flicked on the room's light. She dug around my drawers until finally she let out a triumphant "ah-ha!". I slipped closer to the closet door to see what she had discovered, and she clutched in her hands a small purse. She pounded the purse a few times with her fist, and threw it around the room, enjoying the tingling sound my spare change made inside. Finally, she unzipped the small purse and remarked:
"Hmm....Well, I don't know who's money this is, but I can take it!"
The next morning, I awoke to see the PT sitting calmly on my legs, apparently waiting for me to wake up. She noticed me and screamed "iguana, my wallet is gone!"
I sat up and blinked a few times.
"You had a wallet?"
"Duh! Didn't you ever notice!?"
"um...no....?"
"well, anyway, it's gone! I had all my money in there too!"
"how much money did you have?"
"er....about three pennies, a quarter, and a dime. THAT'S A LOT OF MONEY IGUANA!"
"okay, okay, I'll help you find it."
And the great journey began.....
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
A Fair Trade?
pt: Blargh! iguana! You killed my feet! You soaked them to death!
exclaims the pt whilst we walk into the house through the back door.
me: sorry pt. Do you want me to bury them?
pt: no no no. It's no use. They'll never move again!
me: what a shame
pt: well...I suppose they would move again.
me: ?
pt: well...a thousand years from now, someone will probably dig all the dead people up
me: why?
pt: duh! Because in a thousand years, we'll be trading planets with the martians!
me: ?
pt: you wouldn't sell someone a planet full of dead people, would you?
exclaims the pt whilst we walk into the house through the back door.
me: sorry pt. Do you want me to bury them?
pt: no no no. It's no use. They'll never move again!
me: what a shame
pt: well...I suppose they would move again.
me: ?
pt: well...a thousand years from now, someone will probably dig all the dead people up
me: why?
pt: duh! Because in a thousand years, we'll be trading planets with the martians!
me: ?
pt: you wouldn't sell someone a planet full of dead people, would you?
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
Saturday, February 23, 2008
Maybe later
I have too many science, history, geography, and Navi projects to work on. I shouldn't be blogging!
Friday, February 15, 2008
First Class Lunch Brass
Our class (about 16 girls) has lunch at 12:10 p.m with the seventh grade (about 7 girls) in a lunch room with 10 tables for 10 minutes. That doesn't stop everyone from sitting at thier own table. That's why I made a chart! :)
First Brass; more popular girls; trouble makers: Table one
Us middle class; average students: table four
5th grade; trade table: table six
private table; secrecy tables: table eight
Kindergarden tables; messiest things on earth: table two
So that's about it. I sit at table four with the body of my class. The more popular girls; the trouble makers as some people view them; sit at table one near the microphone. We don't really know why they put that microphone there, but I can guess it's not for 6th graders to play around with. The trade table; or where ever the 5th grade sits; is something that may have bewildered some people. All like: "oh, how could those sweet little children possibly break the rules?!". Well we break them. Most of the time, the trade table is where you will find the beggars, or people who threw away their lunch because they didn't like what their mothers put in it, and go around pleading for scraps of other people's lunches. I, personally, think everyone should make their own lunch, but that's just me. I don't go there often because I'm scared of being mugged. That actually happened once.
I was coming back from the washing room back to table four to eat lunch with my friends. I had expected to trade some crackers for cookies, so I sat down and pulled them out. I saw my friend was near table six, so I went to go get her. It seems she was trading with one of the 5th graders and had just finished. I was almost there when a pint-sized kid snatched the bag of crackers right out of my hand. Then she ran off with them, laughing like a crazy lunitic. I just stood there and watched as she noisly devoured my snack, still shaking with laughter.
Something is wrong with these kids.
So I don't go down there anymore. I still hold a modest trade at table four, but if someone wants me, they'll have to come there. Sometimes we go to table one to trade with the popular kids, but they always have the same foods. The food I believe will one day be American currency: potato chips. If let's say you're playing elimination, and someone tells you to get them in and they'll give you some potato chips, the averege student will accept. I don't take bribes, but I usually don't play elimination either. Bribes can take you a LONG way in the lunchroom, and even give you a seat at table one, but I don't know why you'd want that. All those kids do is make fun of their relatives.
End of post.
It seemed like a fun idea as I typed it.
First Brass; more popular girls; trouble makers: Table one
Us middle class; average students: table four
5th grade; trade table: table six
private table; secrecy tables: table eight
Kindergarden tables; messiest things on earth: table two
So that's about it. I sit at table four with the body of my class. The more popular girls; the trouble makers as some people view them; sit at table one near the microphone. We don't really know why they put that microphone there, but I can guess it's not for 6th graders to play around with. The trade table; or where ever the 5th grade sits; is something that may have bewildered some people. All like: "oh, how could those sweet little children possibly break the rules?!". Well we break them. Most of the time, the trade table is where you will find the beggars, or people who threw away their lunch because they didn't like what their mothers put in it, and go around pleading for scraps of other people's lunches. I, personally, think everyone should make their own lunch, but that's just me. I don't go there often because I'm scared of being mugged. That actually happened once.
I was coming back from the washing room back to table four to eat lunch with my friends. I had expected to trade some crackers for cookies, so I sat down and pulled them out. I saw my friend was near table six, so I went to go get her. It seems she was trading with one of the 5th graders and had just finished. I was almost there when a pint-sized kid snatched the bag of crackers right out of my hand. Then she ran off with them, laughing like a crazy lunitic. I just stood there and watched as she noisly devoured my snack, still shaking with laughter.
Something is wrong with these kids.
So I don't go down there anymore. I still hold a modest trade at table four, but if someone wants me, they'll have to come there. Sometimes we go to table one to trade with the popular kids, but they always have the same foods. The food I believe will one day be American currency: potato chips. If let's say you're playing elimination, and someone tells you to get them in and they'll give you some potato chips, the averege student will accept. I don't take bribes, but I usually don't play elimination either. Bribes can take you a LONG way in the lunchroom, and even give you a seat at table one, but I don't know why you'd want that. All those kids do is make fun of their relatives.
End of post.
It seemed like a fun idea as I typed it.
Sunday, February 3, 2008
The new and completely finished story
When we went to Israel a little while ago, Mrs. B gave me a composision notebook to write down everything I saw and found interesting, But that got pretty boring after a while, so instead I used it to begin writing a little anicdote I started in 3rd grade but never finished, so this time I thought I'd get the whole story. It's called "the chocolate Uranus.". I've still got a few more paragraphs to go, but this is a great story, I chuckle just reading it, although I doubt any readers would, it could be that the things I wrote are only funny to me, but anyway, I hope to get it up soon. But I also might not, it might be too embarresing. It's about a lunitic who lives in the future who decided that aliens live somewhere in the galaxy so he goes to look for them, and ends up taking a wormhole to another galaxy. It's actually the same galaxy, but evreything is made out of food, so they check out Uranus first, but I'm not going to give away the story, because I still don't know if anyone will like it! So if someone wants to hear it, you'll just have to wait a bit for me to finish it. Then I've decided to get it up here in a jiffy.
PS: sorry about any misspellings, the spell check isn't working.
PS: sorry about any misspellings, the spell check isn't working.
Sunday, January 27, 2008
A week full of happiness
The title describes my winter break. Mostly. Okay not the orthodontist. Brr....That one still gives me the creeps. Unfortunately the PT has done nothing funny except write a book called "Be grand". Shall I rehearse it? P.S, it will be in the PT's spelling:
cover
B GRAND
BY PT
ILUUSSTRATTED(illustrated) BY PT
STAPLED BY MOM
page 1
WUT A NIYSE SKY
page 2
MY NAME IS B
page 3
HO NO! THE SKY IS BING BLOWN UP!
page 4 (picture of a man holding a bug)
HAHA! YU R MY BUG NAW
page 5 (man drops bug)
NO!
page 6 (man crying)
WA! MY HAWS HAS BEN SKWISHINATED (sqwishinated) BY THE GRL!
And from that point on, everything else is illegible. Now we have the PT's book "no no no no".
page 1 (a boy and a rabbi are sitting in shul. The boy begins to cry)
MEISHY, (moshe) ARE YU SCARED OF SOMETHING?
page 2 (boys thought bubble shows thief stealing cheese)
NO, NUTHING AT ALL
page 3 (rabbi looks around)
NAW WERE IS MY SIDDUR?
page 4 (moshe sees thief stealing siddur)
NO!
page 5 (thief leaves shul shouting:
HO
page 6 (thief tries to throw siddur in fire)
NO!
page 7 (moshe catches it)
HA I CAGHT IT read as "hmm, I seem to have caught it"
page 8 (thief tries to grab siddur away)
I GOT IT FRST!
page 9 (siddur rips)
HO NO!
page 10 (girl cries)
JESSICA STORTED TO CRY who's Jessica?
page 11 (Jessica jumps up and down)
I NO! (know)
page 12 (Jessica talks to thief)
HAW DO YOU RASE YOUR HAND IN SKOOL?
page 13 (as thief raises his hands, Jessica cuts them off)
HA GOT YOU
page 14 (shows a picture of a newspaper. It reads
LITL FEETH DEFEETED
page 15 (shows Jessica handing something to rabbi)
THE BOOK IS RIPED rabbi answers SO IT IS, EH?
page 16 (shows rabbi patting Jessica and moshe on the head)
JESSICA AND MOSHE, YOU WER A GRAT HELP, AND A BIG MITSVA TOO!
the end.
cover
B GRAND
BY PT
ILUUSSTRATTED(illustrated) BY PT
STAPLED BY MOM
page 1
WUT A NIYSE SKY
page 2
MY NAME IS B
page 3
HO NO! THE SKY IS BING BLOWN UP!
page 4 (picture of a man holding a bug)
HAHA! YU R MY BUG NAW
page 5 (man drops bug)
NO!
page 6 (man crying)
WA! MY HAWS HAS BEN SKWISHINATED (sqwishinated) BY THE GRL!
And from that point on, everything else is illegible. Now we have the PT's book "no no no no".
page 1 (a boy and a rabbi are sitting in shul. The boy begins to cry)
MEISHY, (moshe) ARE YU SCARED OF SOMETHING?
page 2 (boys thought bubble shows thief stealing cheese)
NO, NUTHING AT ALL
page 3 (rabbi looks around)
NAW WERE IS MY SIDDUR?
page 4 (moshe sees thief stealing siddur)
NO!
page 5 (thief leaves shul shouting:
HO
page 6 (thief tries to throw siddur in fire)
NO!
page 7 (moshe catches it)
HA I CAGHT IT read as "hmm, I seem to have caught it"
page 8 (thief tries to grab siddur away)
I GOT IT FRST!
page 9 (siddur rips)
HO NO!
page 10 (girl cries)
JESSICA STORTED TO CRY who's Jessica?
page 11 (Jessica jumps up and down)
I NO! (know)
page 12 (Jessica talks to thief)
HAW DO YOU RASE YOUR HAND IN SKOOL?
page 13 (as thief raises his hands, Jessica cuts them off)
HA GOT YOU
page 14 (shows a picture of a newspaper. It reads
LITL FEETH DEFEETED
page 15 (shows Jessica handing something to rabbi)
THE BOOK IS RIPED rabbi answers SO IT IS, EH?
page 16 (shows rabbi patting Jessica and moshe on the head)
JESSICA AND MOSHE, YOU WER A GRAT HELP, AND A BIG MITSVA TOO!
the end.
Sunday, January 20, 2008
So that's where they came from
Breaking news everybloody! I've finally got straight from the PT where her imagination comes from. I know what you're all thinking: "WUAT?" Well, last Shabbos we were sitting in the basement looking at a globe, and I asked "PT, where does your imagination come from?" and she looked me in the eye and said:
PT: it's a secret, BUT I can tell you where Yoninica is!
Me (getting excited): where?
PT: (points to random spec of land in the center of the south Atlantic ocean) THERE!
me: uh....where?
PT: see? That's how secret it is!
me: but if Yoninica is an unspeakably small island in the middle of an ocean, how did all those badguys get to it?
PT: they swam! DUH!
me: from where?
PT: Africa! Duh!
me: uh...Where in Africa?
PT: downtown
me: where's downtown Africa?
PT: iguana, isn't it obvious? I mean, everyone knows where downtown Africa is!
me: well, I don't
PT: it's somewhere over here (points to Kenya)
me: no, PT that's Kenya
PT: no no no...I'm not pointing to that! I'm pointing to the 'A' in Africa!
me: (trying to comprehend)
PT: it's a secret, BUT I can tell you where Yoninica is!
Me (getting excited): where?
PT: (points to random spec of land in the center of the south Atlantic ocean) THERE!
me: uh....where?
PT: see? That's how secret it is!
me: but if Yoninica is an unspeakably small island in the middle of an ocean, how did all those badguys get to it?
PT: they swam! DUH!
me: from where?
PT: Africa! Duh!
me: uh...Where in Africa?
PT: downtown
me: where's downtown Africa?
PT: iguana, isn't it obvious? I mean, everyone knows where downtown Africa is!
me: well, I don't
PT: it's somewhere over here (points to Kenya)
me: no, PT that's Kenya
PT: no no no...I'm not pointing to that! I'm pointing to the 'A' in Africa!
me: (trying to comprehend)
A F R I C A
*down town*
So, if anyone plans on making a trip to Africa, don't forget to visit downtown! and watch out for PT's imaginary enemies.
Thursday, January 10, 2008
PT the movie critic
The PT and I were watching a movie called "The Iron Giant" lately. At the end of the movie, the main character is found on a glacier in Greenland. The PT watches this scene and says:
PT: Hey, I know where he is! He's on PLUTO!
iguana: No, actually he's in Greenland, PT.
PT: Huh? Greenland? What planet is that?
Look me in the face and tell me that isn't funny.
PT: Hey, I know where he is! He's on PLUTO!
iguana: No, actually he's in Greenland, PT.
PT: Huh? Greenland? What planet is that?
Look me in the face and tell me that isn't funny.
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